Uncreated Conscience

I’m a bit burned out; I have two editorial letters to write, a manuscript to read and write a report for, and another for one of my newest critique partners. Unfortunately I think I am completely “read out” at the moment. I went through about 100 queries today for El Jefe and my brain isn’t functioning enough to write anything else coherent.

For your amusement, under the cut I submit my thoughts about the first 25 queries I read and why they did or did not work for me (and El Jefe). A few requests are in there which I think illuminates more my own personal tastes than anything else. Clearly I love anything with zombies. I love zombie fiction. (Still unsure about PRIDE & PREJUDICE & ZOMBIES though.) Mind you, anything I like has to be within the umbrella of what El Jefe would like, but my boss’s reading tastes are just about as broad and varied as mine.

(more…)

You know, when I was younger, I used to think that being a housewife would be one of the worst occupations ever. Cleaning? Cooking? Doing chores? Ew! But the older I get, the more joy I take in small domestic tasks like decorating my apartment and keeping it clean. Playing Wifey for Bear this past week gave me a taste of what being a hausfrau would be like and I’ll admit it, it was kind of nice to keep house and cook for him while I frittered away on my computer and worked on editorial letters and revised my novel. I could totally work from home. I might even enjoy it. When I left New Jersey last night, I left Bear a week’s worth of crustless shrimp and mushroom mini-quiches in the freezer to take for lunch. My poor Bear has no time to sleep, let alone eat while he studies for med school exams.

But then again, I take just as much joy walking into the office and doing my job. Today we had a subrights tutorial at Ye Olde Literary Agency which was fascinating and educational (yes, I am stodgy and boring that way) and I spent the rest of the day reading manuscripts, fretting over editorial letters I have to write (why does everything I write sound offensive?), and going through the slush. I am rather ashamed to say I have an enormous backlog of slush to wade through—El Jefe only takes snail mail submissions and sometimes the paper queries just get pushed aside for more important things.

I’m noticing a big trend in many of the queries I receive and that’s a general sort of vagueness. I’ll admit that I thoroughly love reading slush because I like to pick out the crazies and shake my head in disbelief but I equally love finding diamonds in the rough. (I’m still waiting on pins and needles for a requested partial about a time-travelling prankster to arrive!) Excitement (or any strong reaction in general) is a large part of what makes slush-slogging so enjoyable but a sort of ennui has settled over me as I rifle through the submissions. It isn’t that the queries are bad, but they’re not great either.

Someone once said God is in the details and the same applies to a query. Details, details, details are crucial. I’ve read dozens of submissions that say things like “the story contains tragedy and suspense and is a moving love story” without giving me any of the specific elements that make it so. “A man grows up in a small town, discovers secrets about his family, and comes to a new understanding of himself.” In and of itself, this is not a bad query. But there’s absolutely nothing about it that stands out. Which town? What secret? How does his view of himself change?

Why, why, why? That’s the question “wh” word I find myself using the most often. “Why does the protagonist do what s/he does? Why should we care?” If the query isn’t too vague, sometimes the stakes aren’t high enough. Physical consequences may be high (“If we don’t retrieve the Sword of Destiny the world will end!”) but personal investment is low. Why does this sleuth want to solve the mystery? It isn’t enough to go on a quest for the Sword of Destiny or solve the mystery simply for the sake of going on a quest or solving the mystery. The characters need to have motivation. The writer might know what these character’s motivations are, but the rest of us don’t unless it is specified.

I’m sure I will have more thoughts on queries at a later date, being as I have a pile LARGER THAN MY HEAD to slog through this week. This is me unconscious.

P.S. I have officially lived in New York long enough that I read “Houston, TX” as “HOW-ston” in my head instead of “HEW-ston.”

Rumours of my death have not been greatly exaggerated as I am, in fact, not dead. Blogging silence reigns when you have no internet access at work and when Twitter insidiously begins to take over your online life. Also when you’re in New Jersey playing wifey for Bear while he studies himself to the bone for med school exams: cleaning his apartment, buying groceries, dropping him off at school, and taking his computer to get fixed at the Apple store.

Nevertheless, I have been meaning to review Cassandra Clare‘s CITY OF GLASS for a while; I bought it Tuesday and finished it that night but haven’t yet gotten around to organising my thoughts on it. I gave it another read Wednesday and Thursday because I admittedly skimmed large portions of it (especially the battle scenes) to find out what happens.

Review of CITY OF GLASS by Cassandra Clare

City of Glass by Cassandra Clare

I’ve mentioned before that I have a long history with the author, stemming back to when I used to read her HARRY POTTER fanfiction when I was 15. (Say what you will about fanfiction, but online fandom is an awe-inspiring and mighty thing.) While I was excited to read CITY OF BONES, I have been less excited about each subsequent novel, CITY OF ASHES and CITY OF GLASS. My buying the books on the days of release is part author loyalty (such as it is), part obligation, and part curiosity. Curiosity is the major motivating factor of course because I don’t care much about the characters or the story but by gum tell me once and for all whether or not Jace and Clary are siblings so I can stop reading them whine all the time.

Spoilers to follow.

(more…)

I haven’t been in a blogging sort of mood lately, mostly because I can’t quite think of topics to blog about that aren’t related to my life (to be fair, I blog about my life all the time, but since working at The Literary Agency I have tried to include musings about publishing). I made good on my promise to be productive on my week off from work and did some significant revisions on my own novel in addition to (gasp!) cooking for myself and doing yoga.

Speaking of yoga, I went to a hot yoga class at Yoga to the People last night and I have never been more wrecked after a practice in my life although I will also say that I have felt better either (this morning that is). I’ve been practicing yoga on and off since high school (more off than on, sadly) and I thought I could survive 90 minutes of poses in a sauna.

I couldn’t have been more wrong. I am ashamed to say that I couldn’t participate in more than 20% of the class. I had never felt closer to fainting than in that class; I had to spend a lot of the standing poses in Child’s pose or else modify them somehow. It was fairly crowded but the instructor was great at giving us all individual attention and pushing us to our edge without ever hurting us. I tottered home after it was done and climbed straight into bed without dinner or a shower; I was that wrung out.

…I may have to go again tonight.

Today at work is mostly spent inventorying books and sending out the requests and rejections from El Jefe’s slush pile. I am on pins and needles waiting for the partial of the time-travel book. I hope it’s good.

Also, I will probably walk to Border’s after work and get CITY OF GLASS by Cassandra Clare. If Jace and Clary end up siblings I will eat my hat. And I have an extensive hat collection.

I got an email this morning from La Junior Agent forwarded from El Jefe (who is on holiday in Florida, I believe) forwarded from his (potential?) client who said he really liked the editorial suggestions I made to his manuscript and that if I had any more I ought to send them along as soon as possible. I had been led to believe that I would have little or no interaction with agents because the intern assists the assistant, but I have been rather fortunate to have the head honcho of this literary agency take an interest in me. El Jefe is adorable; he refers to me (in writing) as “Jay Jay.” (La Junior Agent for the first few days called me “Jo-Jo.” Perhaps I ought to give up and go back to being called “Sarah.” Ew, just looking at that name makes me shudder.) I have a self-pubbed memoir to read and report on when he comes back. I have read the first 5 pages. The answer is no.

LOST this season is a bit uneven. Last week’s episode was amazing; this week’s was less so. The plot moved forward an inch. Another plothole appeared. It’s really bothering me that Sun is the only one of the Oceanic Six to not have flashed back to 1977. This seems to be a hole in the worldbuilding, which I cannot forgive. I can understand Ben and Locke not being flashed back; they turned the donkey wheel and moved/fixed the Island. There is an intuitive leap there. But Sun? Why was she excluded? Also, I am liking her less and less as the series goes on, not that I liked her much in the first place. Another thing that annoys me a little: her name is not just “Sun.” It’s Sun-Hwa. Jin’s name is Jin-Soo. Korean names consist of two syllables! …except mine of course. But I am a speshul and yooneek snowflake.

Also, Ben’s creeptastic potential was significantly decreased in this past episode. Where is my crazy bug-eyed evil weasel? (His younger counterpart is sufficiently scary and bug-eyed too, but Sterling Beaumont is no Michael Emerson.) Oh Benry, I love you!

Revisions have been going, which is a miracle in my case. Going ever so slowly, but going. Kickstarting my diet has been going well too. Lost 2lbs since yesterday. I am waiting for Fresh Direct to deliver me my produce so I can make a salad for dinner. I anticipate avocados eagerly.

I am shallow and frivolous. Carry on.

I am inordinately proud of myself as I have managed to be productive on my days off from The Literary Agency thus far (we shall see how long this productive streak continues). Yesterday I was slightly derailed in my plans with the appearance of my friend Kristine, but I managed to make some crustless mini-quiches and vacuum the floors in my apartment before she came over and we hung out. I enlightened her to the insane awesome that is Alan Moore and LOST GIRLS as well as promising to lend her THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH after she’s finished reading ULYSSES. (Another James Joyce fan! I feel as though we are a rare and pretentious breed.)

Perhaps I can attribute my rise in energy levels to the rising temperatures. Today is even more gorgeous than yesterday and I’m hoping that spring has come to stay in New York at last. Of course, as soon as I celebrate this the weather is going deliver a bitchslap smackdown. March in the northeast sucks that way. It doesn’t help that my father texts me daily with updates about the gorgeous weather Los Angeles has been enjoying. I hate my dad. (No, I don’t. I love my father. He offered me beer money to tide me through these rough economic times. I declined. Mostly because I don’t drink. Book money? Now that I can most wholeheartedly use.)

Things still left on my to-do list:

1. Grocery shopping. It is about time I grew up and started feeding myself. Also, must lose weight. New Year’s resolution to lose 5lbs has become resolution to lose 10lbs to get back to my summer weight. 15lbs is ideal.
2. Laundry. Poor White-Harp; she needs a bath badly. She’s annoyed at me for keeping her in her prolonged state of filth. o(>.< )o
3. Deposit check from El Jefe’s party. Money is always good.
4. Make crustless mini-quiches for dinner and freeze the leftovers to take for lunch next week.
5. Revise my book. I have been much better about this in recent weeks. Remember to send out revisions to The Kitchen Girls and Rachel.
6. Spring redesign for Uncreated Conscience and Moot Point. And look into purchasing domain name.
7. WATCH LOST.
8. Do hot yoga with Sofa at Yoga to the People. I need to get back into my practice.

I am generally of a sanguine disposition but I have been even more cheerful of late. When El Jefe took me out for lunch last week he told me he was impressed with the editorial readers reports I’ve written for him and that if I wanted, I could stay on at the agency through the summer. If I can’t find a literary or editorial assistant position when the internship ends in May, at least I’ll still be working. The longer I’m in publishing the more I’m convinced that this is what I want to be doing. What was I thinking when I worked in finance for two years after university?

Well, I meant to discuss science fiction and fantasy as mode but instead rambled off into discussion about my life. Beg pardon.

(more…)

I meant to review both EVERNIGHT by Claudia Gray and THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH by Carrie Ryan this weekend but I was somewhat incapacitated by extreme fatigue. Why? I’m not sure. I was fearful of coming down with some sort of illness, but after having slept all day Sunday, I awoke this morning chipper and ready for work (albeit out in New Jersey–the commute was surprisingly easy this morning). Saturday I hung out with Katranna, wherein we discussed our favourite types of books as she cooked me food (she’s so awesome) and had tea.

Floating about the brain this morning is the stigma of science fiction/fantasy. All over my Twitter account is this article about SciFi channel changing their name to SyFy in order to shed its association with “geeks and dysfunctional, antisocial boys in their basements with video games.” Firstly, excuse me, but I’m a geek and quite proud of it. I am also dating a geek in medical school and while we love our video games, he’s also decidedly not dysfunctional (well, more than usual) or antisocial (he’s actually more social than flitterygibbet little me). I generally find that geeks and nerds are the most interesting sorts of people to talk to.

Secondly, the name “SyFy” is simply ridiculous. No one, but no one, is going to read that and think “Hmmm, I wonder what that stands for. Perhaps this television station is full of interesting, non-genre related programming!” I’m not sure why network execs think that this move is going to prevent them from being “held back.” There is an audience for everything and while science fiction and fantasy are certainly somewhat niche, so are chick flicks and Lifetime television (there’s a stigma attached to those as well). Know thy audience; it will probably serve you better in the longer run. What have been the big blockbuster movies of the past five years? Comic book and fantasy movies. Spiderman, The Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Harry Potter. Ain’t nothing wrong with science fiction and fantasy; they seem to be pulling in the big bucks. SciFi Channel has seen an increase in viewers in the past year, but I think in these rough economic times, it’s because science fiction and fantasy is a great form of escapism.

Thirdly, I take umbrage with the assumption that genre consumers are by and large 1) male and 2) antisocial and dysfunctional. I am girl, thank you. I am also probably freakishly well-adjusted (despite my attempts at the contrary). I am a girl who likes to read and write fantasy and graphic novels with two lovely parents who would rather have me shot than mooch off them by living in the basement (of which southern California doesn’t have any). Science fiction and fantasy is not merely elves and sorcery and other tropes and clichés; it can span anything from Charlie Kauffman’s Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind to Haruki Murakami’s THE WIND-UP BIRD CHRONICLE to TV’s LOST.

More on fantasy as mode on another day. I did promise to review a few books after all.

Reviews of the following after the cut

1. The movie Tropic Thunder
2. EVERNIGHT by Claudia Gray
3. THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH by Carrie Ryan

(more…)

Today was rather unconscionably busy: fielding phone calls for El Jefe, reading partials, taking inventory of books. I had planned to post about science fiction/fantasy not as genre but mode (inspired by Sarah Monette) but cannot muster up the requisite energy to do so.

On the upside, had lunch with El Jefe today. He is a lovely, lovely man and it was incredible to have the opportunity to talk to him about his experiences as an agent of bestselling novels and founder of one of the most prestigious literary agencies in the business.

I was going to post when I got home but I got completely distracted by reading books. Last week I started Claudia Gray‘s EVERNIGHT at the Borders next to New York Penn Station while waiting for Bear to get into the city. It’s not exactly my cup of tea, being as it contains vampires, but it definitely kept me reading so I went back to Borders to read the rest. I ended up buying EVERNIGHT and Carrie Ryan‘s THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH, which has been earning fabulous reviews. (Full reviews to follow when I am slightly more coherent.) EVERNIGHT certainly had some of the most unusual twists ever in a vampire novel (which I loved) but I absolutely could not read THE FOREST OF HANDS AND TEETH fast enough. Despite my fatigue, I’m afraid I shan’t be able to sleep for fear of the coming zombie apocalypse. Carrie Ryan’s novel reminds me a bit of Cormac McCarthy’s THE ROAD. I will elucidate what I mean by that later.

Right now I have to search my apartment for an axe or any other rusted gardening implement in case the zombies come get me in my sleep.

Last week an agent decided to declare a day of #queryfail on Twitter in which I participated. I had a blast reading other people’s posts and comments about the idea and submitted not a few of my own as I went through El Jefe’s slush. Unfortunately there has been a backlash against #queryfail as many people cited it as being mocking or cruel, despite our best intentions not to make it so.

C’est la vie, of course. People read what they will and no one has authority to say This is how it is and there are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. (Unless you are Alan Moore because only he is the messenger between our world and the universe his characters inhabit. Can I repeat how much I love this man?) I’m surprised that people are ignoring #queryfail’s counterpart #querywin, in which a few of us tried to post what did work for us in a query. But alas, it was #queryfail that caught everyone’s attention and passion, not #querywin.

Why did I participate? I’m not an agent, or even an agent’s assistant; I am a lowly intern. I participated because I am my bosses’ first line of defense, so to speak. In larger agencies, there are often assistants and interns who slog through the slush before passing the “good” ones onto their superiors. I participated because as an aspiring writer myself, I had done a lot of research online before even taking this position about how to write a professional query, how to craft a good hook, how to pitch, etc. and I wanted to show my other aspiring writer-friends what they are up against. And I participated because I’m fond of absurdist humour (as are many of my Twitter friends) and the truly bizarre proposals we get sometimes are worth noting. (If you’re somewhat sensitive, publishing is perhaps not the business for you.) My roommate also works at a literary agency and between the two of us, we have accumulated quite a list of bizarre lines from queries that we commiserate over. (Another one of my friends who used to work at an agency had what they called a Wall of Shame.)

(more…)

Saw Watchmen again last night with Sir Gay, which he enjoyed. Bear and Sir Gay seem to be exceptions among people who have not read WATCHMEN who also enjoyed the film. (I am of two minds: the movie as a film was worse the second time around, but I can’t help loving it anyway because I’m such a fan.) “I’m impressed,” said Sir Gay, “Hollywood doesn’t make movies like this.”

Actually, they do. I think he’s referring to the subversion of “good” and “evil” which doesn’t belong to Hollywood at all, but Alan Moore. It’s very much a blockbuster Hollywood movie; it’s just that the source material is not, although I believe the transformation of Patrick Wilson into Dan Dreiberg was possibly the most impressive factor for both Bear and Sir Gay.

JJ: Dan Dreiberg? He was the pedophile from Hard Candy.
BEAR: Really?

JJ: Dan Dreiberg? He was Raoul from The Phantom of the Opera.
SIR GAY: The hot one? Really?

My friend Katranna made a post about superheroes, contemplating the swing in the pendulum from “glorious heroism” in comics to “gritty, realistic, and tortured heroes” (as so very nicely encapsulated in Watchmen‘s opening credits and no I won’t stop gushing about them), which had me thinking about the “antihero vs. the villain.”

I’ve perhaps documented too well my love of villains (Ben from LOST, Roger Chillingworth from THE SCARLET LETTER, Alec Stokes-D’Urberville from TESS OF THE D’URBERVILLES, etc.) but I’ve never exactly considered the why of it before. It would be facetious to say that I find Evil appealing, so there must be something else altogether that attracts my interest.

In my comment I touch briefly on the concept of the hero as the champion of the individual. My favourite character in WATCHMEN is Adrian Veidt/Ozymandias who in nearly any other book would be considered an out-and-out villain (he touches on this topic briefly himself). And he is, make no mistake about that, but as with anything else Moore has written, that isn’t necessarily the only aspect of his character. (Spoilers again below the cut.)

(more…)