Children were forgiven and forgotten, but young ladies were fallen. She picked at the frayed cuffs on Raphael's sleeves, wondering when she had gone from forgotten to fallen, wondering if she could ever return to that prelapsarian state.Work in progress
Yeah, it’s from my novel. It’s a darling. Meaning it will probably get killed at some point.
Still, I think this might be a fun exercise. All you writers have darlings? Little snippets of writing you absolutely love and would be resistant to parting with? Post them here!
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Almost posted this to my twitter earlier cause I fell in love with it as soon as it dropped out of me. So glad you asked for these!
Devi smiled languidly up at Leila. Blood covered her from the mouth down, staining the front of her dress. It was on her hands, and also in golden curls of her hair. She was absently playing with the hair of the dead girl on her lap.
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Ooooh I want to read that book!
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Ha ha that could be arranged! It’s not done yet, but if you are serious I always love getting someone’s thoughts=)
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I wrote this as the opening to a short story, but it didn’t work where I had it, so I saved it to use later. So far, it hasn’t found a home….
Obsession. The very word leaves the taste of darkness on the tongue. Ob-sess-ion: a word that is all black velvet, red wine and starry skies. The hissing of a viper, poised to strike, poison skewering the heart. To obsess is to be in the throes of madness. Not always a bad thing, of course, but it is unusual for any obsession to end with trumpets and roses. And certainly not mine.
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Fantastic opening! You for sure have to find a way to use that.
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Just don’t do the “ob-sess-ion” thing–way way waaaay too derivative of “Lo-lee-ta” (whether it was intended that way or not). Plus it works better without anyway. Otherwise I can definitely see why it’s a darling.
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I found this on my phone the other day. I’m not actually sure what book I intended it for:
“If you go in there, we will be armpit deep in corpses. Unfortunately, one of them will be yours.”
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LOL!
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Yay writing! Based on your tweets of late, it seems like you’re doing a good job making that time for yourself.
If I can find/think of a darling, I’ll come back and post it. Right now, though, I’m writing in first person and my protag is not the type to spout “darlings”… She’s more the dry, unpoetic, funny-because-I’m-so-oblivious-to-my-obliviousness type.
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What I great exercise! I’m so happy you’re writing again! I really do want to see Elijah’s Chariot out there soon!
I think I have too many darlings, but this is one that serves the book in more than one way. <3
“Kill him, Grier! Do it now!” I yell this time. Like awakening from a trance, Grier aims her silenced pistol and shoots him square between the eyes. The Harpy inhales sharply, glancing down at his body as it begins to shrivel up and crumble. He looks me in the eye, his expression pained and frightened.
“Nothing is as it seems,” he whispers, then his face turns to ash and scatters to the ground.
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The entire opening of POMEGRANATE SEEDS and/or every smoking scene I’ve ever written. Too long to paste here, but you know exactly the part I mean. =)
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